Taking the Keys Away: 

What to Do If a Senior Won't Stop Driving

As people age, family members might start worrying about their ability to drive safely. It can be hard to make the decision to intervene, but ignoring the signs of unsafe driving can lead to serious consequences.

Health Conditions That Can Impact a Senior’s Driving Ability

Getting older doesn’t automatically mean a person should stop driving, but certain health conditions that come with age can make it unsafe. Issues like poor vision and hearing, slow reaction times, and memory problems can affect a senior's ability to drive safely.

For people with memory problems, like dementia, it can be especially hard to convince them to stop driving. Some seniors with dementia may not realize their own limitations, making it difficult to have a productive conversation about safety.

How to Convince a Senior to Stop Driving

Driving represents independence for many seniors, so losing this ability can feel overwhelming. It may even lead to feelings of depression because they can’t go places on their own. It's best to approach this topic carefully. Have an open discussion with your loved one, explaining why you think it’s no longer safe for them to drive. Point out specific reasons, like vision problems, medications that make them drowsy, or recent accidents or tickets.

Instead of simply telling them to stop driving, suggest other ways they can get around, like rides from family and friends, public transportation, or ridesharing services. Offering alternatives can make this transition easier. You could suggest a “trial period” to test these new options and see if they work.

However, if your loved one has severe memory problems or doesn’t recognize their own limitations, a conversation may not be enough. In this case, outside help may be necessary.

Getting Help to Encourage a Senior to Stop Driving

If your loved one refuses to stop driving, you might need support from others. Here are some people who might help:

• Their Doctor: Seniors may be more likely to listen to their doctor than family members. The doctor can provide a professional opinion on their ability to drive safely. In some cases, the doctor might even help by providing a report that can be sent to the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) if necessary.

• Eye Doctor: Good vision is essential for driving. If poor vision is part of the problem, their eye doctor can provide an assessment or documentation to support the decision to stop driving.

• Elder Law Attorney: A lawyer can explain the legal risks of unsafe driving, like the impact an accident could have on their finances. Sometimes, seniors will listen to advice when it’s about protecting their estate or avoiding legal issues.

• DMV: If other attempts fail, family members can contact the DMV to report a concern. The DMV might ask the senior to pass a vision or driving test to decide if they can keep their license. Different states have different rules, but the DMV can sometimes intervene when safety is at risk.

• Taking Away the Keys: If nothing else works, you might need to take the car keys or remove the car. However, this step can lead to conflict, and it’s best to try all other options first.

5 Signs It's Time to Take Away the Keys

Here are some signs that it may be unsafe for a senior to keep driving:

1. Dementia or Memory Issues: Problems with memory and decision-making can lead to getting lost, breaking traffic laws, and making unsafe driving choices.

2. Medication Side Effects: Some medications can cause drowsiness or slow reaction times, making it unsafe to drive.

3. Vision or Hearing Loss: Age-related problems like poor vision or hearing can make it hard to see road signs or hear important sounds like sirens.

4. Accidents or Near Misses: Frequent close calls, unexplained dents on their car, or getting lost on familiar routes are signs that it may be time to stop driving.

5. Declining Physical or Mental Health: Physical limitations like stiff joints, dizziness, or slower reaction times can make driving dangerous.

State Driving Rules for Seniors

Each state has its own rules about driving for older adults. Some states require seniors to renew their licenses in person after a certain age and may ask them to pass a vision test. You can also confidentially report a concern to the DMV, providing evidence for why you believe they should be evaluated.

Finding Transportation Alternatives

If your loved one can no longer drive, there are options to help them get around, such as public transportation, community ridesharing programs, and services offered by caregivers or local organizations.

Helping a loved one stop driving can be challenging, but ensuring their safety – and the safety of others – is essential.